lately, i have become keenly aware of how strange i am. i mean, i always kinda knew... but some of the things coming out of my mouth lately are so strange, that it startles me. por ejemplo...
"well, if we can't do it (cut down our christmas tree) right, then i guess we'll just rip off the abortionists."
or
"i should say, if i had to marry a sandwich, this would be the one... not if i could marry a sandwich."
or
"honey, don't tell a lie just because you want someone to pull your legs."
or
"i don't know a song about a puppy going na-night, but i can sing you a song about jesus and some hay!?"
or, my personal favorite,
"just pretend my upper half is stuck in a metal canister and you have to really jostle me out."
it's no wonder, then, that my children are the way they are. they have a way of seeing things (and saying things) that continues to crack me up... and sometimes blow my mind. one cloudy night, when annalee was only two years old, she whispered to me, "mama, the moon went in the cloud's pocket."
marlie has called lasagna "a-la-bazoonia" since i can remember.
when harper was still having accidents during potty-training, he would say "i drilled a little in my undies." and to this day, if he sees something wet on the floor or couch, he says it's "prolly drill."
now london has started with all these shenanigans. today alone, she asked to wear "high fives," told me to check out her "waffles on the snow man" and notified me that my pocket had pooped. i realize this is all very cryptic, so allow me to translate.
high fives? = gloves
waffles on the snow man? = footprints (that look like waffles) in the snow (there was no man.)
my pooping pocket? = when my cell phone slipped out of my pocket and landed on the floor.
i love how she sees things. i love that she sees things. i have spent much of this year just trying to make myself SEE things. to be present, aware, thankful. this is really hard. it is much easier to miss it all in my distraction. to check out, ignore, complain.
with four strange and amazing kids, what a waste if i miss a second of it! so, 'tis the season to keep that crappy phone (ha. ha.) in my pocket, and throw on some high fives and make tons of waffles in the snowman. and... if i happen to get my torso stuck in a metal canister, i have a great family who will jostle me free at the drop of a hat. what more could a girl want? well, besides maybe a little alabazoonia...
I love the pooping pocket! That is brilliant! and hilarious : )
ReplyDeleteI'm with ya. we are in a new town, in a new church. There's nothing like trying to build relationships with new people to remind you how weird you are. I mean, I'm cracking some seriously funny jokes people! ***Crickets***